I seem to have completely lost the ability to put anything on paper (or to the screen) that isn't completely awful drivel. I've recently ripped page after page from my notebook to cast into the flames. Crap that made me cringe to read it.... Well, this too shall pass...hopefully....
And then this morning I saw this at the Writers Almanac. I've bolded a part resonant with me. I've bolded and italicized a part most resonant...:
The Great Poem
Lawrence Raab
The great poem is always possible.
Think of Keats and his odes.
But we shouldn't have to be dying,
What I'm writing now is not
the great poem. After a few lines
I could tell. It may not even be
a particularly good poem, although
it's too early to decide about that.
Keep going, I say. See what happens.
But trying hard is one of the problems.
since it shows in the lines as a strain
or struggle that reminds the reader
too much of the writer, whereas
most readers want to listen alone.
The great poem, I think, will arrive
when I no longer care. Perhaps
I'll have abandoned art altogether,
and I won't even want to write
the poem down. But then I'll remember
what I once would have given
for this moment, and I'll go back
to my desk. And I'll write the poem
as though I were another person,
someone I will never be again.
from The History of Forgetting.
Yes, I think that's exactly when the great poem will probably arrive. Kinda reminds me of another post I once made.
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I totally get this.
ReplyDeleteI know for me that when I have to "work" at a poem or a post, then is has lost it's appeal; the original thought or idea or event that inspired the creativity gets lost somewhere... gets muddled up in the "work".
I hardly ever post anything that has not been spewed directly from my heart within a matter of minutes... I do have a long, long list of non-published posts and poems and I pretty much guarantee they will never be published. Why? Again, it's because in "working" to "get it right" what I identified with in the first place has been lost...
Now, this isn't to say that I don't ever do a little editing. But, the idea as a whole has to flow directly out...it cannot be broken down and analyzed for it's parts. If if does not flow out in one sitting, all imperfections included, then it probably has forever lost the vitality that it might possibly have had....
Val,
ReplyDeleteVery well said, thank you. Yes, I have that pile of never published posts too...the original "spark" in them got lost somehow, somewhere, who knows...and they'll never see the light of day. Every once in awhile I just delete them....
Very taoist. As soon as you stop trying, it works. :)
ReplyDeleteSylvia,
ReplyDeleteIndeed. Wu wei. Too bad I can't seem to learn this lesson more often in life too....
When I read the first paragraph of this post -- before reading the poem itself with the text in bold -- I thought to myself, "He's trying to hard!"
ReplyDeleteIn a way, I think this is one of the inherent problems with blogging. In time, we each develop something of a following, be it large or small. Our readers become part of our virtual community and the way we communicate with them is by posting things on our blogs. This often creates an INTERNAL pressure to write something, anything, to keep the conversation going.
But this is problematic for philosophical types like you or I. There are times when we have a lot to say on a variety of issues and other times when we need to withdraw for reflection.
Forest, you're certainly NOT the first person to struggle with this dilemma; I struggle with it all the time. I'm sure Val does too. :)
We each need to write and share when we have something to say and to be able to walk away from the keyboard when the words don't flow forth. When we try to force things, the end product irritates us, not because we're not as poetic as usual, but because we fell victim to this compulsion to write when we really didn't feel like sharing in the first place.
RT,
ReplyDeleteWords of wisdom well said, just as Val did, and between the two of you, I think you've covered it.... Thank you.
I would replace Berry's recommendation to 'live, and then write' with 'feel, and then write.'
ReplyDeleteIf you're finding it difficult to write these days, try feeling more deeply. Really feeling... all the good and bad in your circumstances and everything in between. Don't judge these feelings, make excuses for them or for any reason try to keep them under the water. Only feel them. Don't let your 'self' get in the way.
I find I need (lots) of moments of silence and this can often result in miscommunications or wrongful assumptions. In real life and also when I read wonderful posts that resonate with me deeply, I sometimes struggle to comment. I suppose there's wisdom in acknowledging that there is alot more to silence than first appearances.
ReplyDeleteNice article about reating,thanks for sharing :)
ReplyDeleteFlandrumhill,
ReplyDeleteOUCH!
Gleaner,
Hmmm. Pondering that....
Marinela,
Thanks.
Thank you all.
Hey FW,
ReplyDeleteKeep on keepin on. Thanks for the poem. Good stuff.
Thank you, Molly, I do appreciate your encouragement.
ReplyDeleteThis is so very true. Poems have to come from the muses and cannot be something reasonably timed or forced.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the reminder.
I've faced the same "trying too hard"ness over and over again. As a teacher, I read in my students' work. If at all possible, our work is best when we are in "the zone", relaxed, confident, in an attitude of conversation with the other, allowing the words to flow with unselfconsciousness. Our egos must be stuffed in our back pockets and sat upon if they tell us to write when we are not in "the zone." It is a worthy discipline.
ReplyDeleteMelissa,
ReplyDeleteI think I agree with you. :)
Thanks.
Barbara,
Wow. Well said. Yes. First, I am glad to know that you're a fellow struggler. :) And second, I certainly agree about the ego stuffing. Worthy discipline indeed. Thank you.
Let me offer a bandaid...
ReplyDeleteA poem begins with a lump in the throat. ~Robert Frost
To have great poets there must be great audiences too. ~Walt Whitman
I think you've already got a great audience here. Now just to find that lump in the throat...
Thanks, Flandrumhill, I'll be keeping an eye out for the lump (mixed metaphor there, I guess....)
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, you are a great audience.
Excellent poem, which I imagine should stir something in every writer.
ReplyDeleteIf I am sitting at the computer, staring at the screen, wondering why my thoughts and even command of language has dried up (I write many first lines that are scrapped)it means I need to go for a walk and stop thinking about whatever I am trying to write. "Trying hard is one of the problems".
Distracted by trees, clouds, birds, flowers, streams, the detail of a beetle or a stone, the wide expanse of a range of hills, my mind often opens up and I can suddenly see how to say what I want to say, how to break through the barriers.
I have to say that this doesn't just apply when I am trying to write an evocative story about a place or a walk or a passionate plea about conserving wild places but also about more mundane stuff like gear reviews and outdoor techniques.
i just kind stumbeled into this page. i dont know what to say
ReplyDelete